DAYS 10 and 11: 9/20 & 9/21 ( Really Days ONE and TWO AGAIN )
Okay. I’m grumpy and NOT in the mood to post. But I will. I pretty much slept through the last three days. For sure I slept through Tuesday and Wednesday. I woke up just long enough to have a snack or small meal, watch some TD Jakes & Joyce Meyers (which was very encouraging btw) and then forced myself back to sleep. I just didn’t want to risk smoking. If i can get through the first 4 days, I’m hoping I’ll be out of the “red” zone. From what i’ve been reading, the first 24 hours are a little hard… then hours 24 – 72 are increasingly brutal. And from my experience, they’re ALL damn hard and i’m sick of doing great for a few days and then throwing it all away over one PUFF.
SO – If i can manage to sleep through most of the “worst” of it – then I will KNOW that all of the nicotine is out of my bloodstream, out of my BODY – and any “crave” is just in my mind – a habit thing. And all that I’ve been reading about everything being “NEW” and for the “first time” (because you really are doing it for the first time, in a long time, without a cigarette…)
The thing I have to admit, is that there is still a large part of me that DOESN’T REALLY WANT TO QUIT. If it weren’t for the health risks, the damage that smoking causes the human body – I wouldn’t quit. Like I said in the first or second post – I ENJOY SMOKING. I don’t care what anyone says about how “we really don’t enjoy it – it’s the addiction that makes us think we enjoy it…” BULLOCKS.
I’m quitting because I don’t want to end up with some nasty smoking-related illness. That’s it. I want to be a good steward of the body God has given me – I want to be HEALTHY. I want my body to be and to function at it’s ABSOLUTE BEST… and it cannot do that while i’m smoking. Period.
That’s all for now – I’m going back to sleep. ;0)